Dear the boy who nearly broke me, but didn't.

Dear you,

I was needy, and so were you. I needed attention, comfort and to know that I wasn't broke.

You gave me everything I wanted, you gave me attention, you took me away on breaks to the city, you bought me make up and chicken nuggets. You told me I was perfect; even when I'd just woken up and I still had last nights make up on. You said you'd keep me safe from my ex, that he was nothing. You supported me throughout my uni days, you video called me when I was crying and wanted to come home. You bought me kebabs even though you were 126 miles away from me, just because I was craving chicken. You were my everything, my world and my all.

... And then I came back from uni and it all changed. It had changed over the weeks, slowly. We talked less, argued more but I put it down to me. I stressed myself out with exams, I know. I didn't sleep or eat because I didn't want people to think I was a failure. I was stressed, you were stressed but I still tried. You gave up on us a long time ago, didn't you?

56 minutes it took you to end things. I begged you, I pleaded for you not to do it but you did. "You'll find someone better than me". I didn't want someone better than you, I wanted you. now it's been 11 weeks and I'm finally back to my normal self. And even better, I see what you mean. I can do better.

You gave me false hope, false commitment and a false love.

And then you got with another girl. 2 days after. 2 days, boy.

don't worry though, I didn't cry for long. 24 hours I gave myself to cry myself to sleep, eat chocolate and watch Bridget Jones. Then I covered my face in the make up you hated, wore the top you didn't agree with and went on a date. Bitch, I felt fabulous.

I don't know what you wanted, expected or thought I would do. But, I'm pretty sure you didn't think I'd bounce back and sill be fabulous.

So, dear the boy who nearly broke me, but didn't. THIS is what I think about you and your intentions.

Fuck you and all the nights I spent wondering why I wasn't perfect for you. I am perfect, I'm a bloody princess and I'll never let you or any other boy make me feel so low and worthless.


P.S I bought you a star for your birthday but I swapped it for some chicken selects and large fries. 0 regrets.

Popular posts from this blog

Me, myself and this little adventure called Uni.

Where I'm at body wise- 2017 UPDATE